beautiful, funny, sad & true

As part of the ‘best of 2007’ series–the pictures will follow sometime soon–here are some of the highlights of the year from BFS&T. It was fun to go back and revisit some of these again, although if I had a nickel for every entry that I titled ‘crazy week’ or ‘super busy’ or ‘phew’ or something like that, I’d have. . .a total of. . .well, actually, I don’t know how much money I’d have. But I did learn at some point that I needed to work on my titles.

Anyway, here’s the list:

* * * * *

December – third grade memories
There are also a few good dreams to be found in December’s archive.

November – taking my blog back
That was a very strange month. I got a fun new hobby, and had some very unusual life experiences too, which–as a nice side effect–hopefully makes for interesting reading.

October – birthday week
October was busy and interesting, and this was the obvious entry choice for the month. Lots of other good entries, though.

September – five-day weekend
The beginning of the month was a whirlwind like August was, but pretty much the rest of it was spent recovering from the huge heartbreak and the whirlwind gigging and traveling schedule of July and August.

August – Nevada trip
Boy, August was brutal. September was, too. It was tough to decide which entry to use as the commemoration, so I chose the most memorable and positive one. I guess if you’re interested, you can go back and check out the other stuff. There’s plenty. I wrote more in August than I did in any other month.

July – week in review
This month was quite possibly the busiest one of my entire life. Tons of interesting gigs, my amazing friend and partner in crime moved away, a family beach vacation. . .this was another tough month to decide which entry to choose.

June – Yakima trip
First genuinely good time I’ve had in Yakima for as long as I can remember, so it is worthy of special mention here. For as busy as July was, and as dark as August was, I have to say that June was pretty great.

May – Mount St. Helens Day
This one is going to get mentioned, too, because it’s a classic:
glad I wasn’t a girl that day
I also went to Seattle, and there’s a good entry about that too. And pictures!

April – a month, disguised as a week
(See also: a week, disguised as a day)
Started out good, then I got blasted open in the middle of the month. After August, this was the craziest month of the year. I also had one of the best gigs of my entire life. Lots of good pictures for you to enjoy.

March – I’ve got ‘The Fever’, Off the Clock
Young Immortals song makes it onto a Starbucks CD. Woo hoo! Lots of pictures and fun times that month, too.

February – OK, All You Dream Interpreters, Vol. III
February was a bit of a roller coaster, with lots of sorta random writing. Although I never write about this subject, work was particularly terrible and stressful back then, and I was out with Then-Girlfriend-Now-Ex a lot, so that didn’t leave as much time for writing. But this dream is one of the most interesting I’ve ever had.

January – Iron Horse
My first band, while I was in high school and a little bit into college. Other than this, January was much like February as far as blog content is concerned. Lots of good pictures, though.

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I hope this is fun and/or interesting to read. It was fun to make, so there you go. I also want to let you know that I really appreciate you reading BFS&T, and I hope you have a happy, lucky, prosperous and fulfilling New Year.

I’m heading up to Seattle tonight, to spend the weekend with my brother and his family. I’m also going to bring some guitars, so I can play with my friend’s band. It’ll be the first time I’ve seen him in about twelve or thirteen years.

I have to work on Monday (LAME!), so I’m driving back from Seattle on Sunday, then if I feel up to it, I’m going to drive back up there after work. I also have to work on Wednesday, so I’ll be driving back on Christmas Day.

One more reason I’m sick of having a day job.

There are about a thousand more; I won’t bore you with all of them, don’t worry, but this whole week has been ridiculously exhausting and stressful. It didn’t used to be this way. I never used to dread going to work, but now I find myself doing that almost every day. I’m always cranky by about 9:30 or 10:00 in the morning, sometimes even earlier than that.

But that’s neither here nor there.

The good news is that I’m gonna have a fun weekend with my brother’s family, and I also get to reconnect and play music with an old friend. I also get to play four hours worth of songs that I’ve never played before. It’s gonna be hilarious and fun.

Time to pack up the car and get outta here.

Today is the one-year anniversary of BFS&T. Actually, to be more accurate, it’s the one-year anniversary of this incarnation of it, because I’ve had a MySpace blog of the same name for two and a half years longer than that. I still use it for a few things, but this one has definitely taken over and become the main one.

Lots has happened in the last year. I learned how to take much better pictures, for one thing. This year’s ‘best pictures of the year’ entry will be quite a step up from last year’s.

This year’s musical accomplishments have been a step up, too. The Young Immortals–whose CD I produced and played on–have had a song picked up by WorldFamousCoffeeCompany, and radio play all over the country. There are even some radio stations in France and Ireland who love and play TYI. There are teenage girls who make videos of themselves singing TYI songs and posting them on WebSiteThat’sLikeTV. This past spring, summer and fall, I made enough money at music-related endeavors that I could have quite easily lived without my day job. Too bad about the whole winter season, though. There’s always a huge drop-off then, and I’m still trying to figure out how to make things happen in that time.

Cello-ness has been steadily improving as well. This year has seen the cello become one of the primary instruments I’ve been called to play, both live and on various recordings. That has caused a certain amount of anxiety for me, since some of my friends are among the best cellists in this town, but I’m also not stupid enough to turn down great opportunities that come my way, either. If it’s something I can play, I play it, and I appreciate every gradual step up.

Romantic relationships continue to be a bit troublesome for me. The one this past year was one of the ones that really changed both of our lives, though, so I suppose I shouldn’t complain too much. As one of my friends likes to say, “You’re just making room for the one that’s the right one.”

Overall, I’d say that things are going really well. Goals? Yes, I have a few. Keep improving myself as a person and as a musician, take more ‘chances’ in my life, TRAVEL MORE, reach out more and be a better friend, take my music career to the next level (and figure out what I want that next level to be), and also to take better care of myself.

Oh yes. . .and of course, to keep blogging steadily. I expect you to help keep me accountable in these endeavors.

Here’s to the next year!

My friend and I were talking the other day, and during that conversation I was reminded of a joke that was making the rounds when I was in third grade–St. Joseph’s Catholic school–that has stuck with me, even these thirty years later. (Dang, I’m old!) Only one other person I’ve told it to has ever heard of the joke, and she also grew up in Washington state. Therefore, I have no choice but to assume that it must be a Washington thing.

So here goes.

Oh wait. . .a couple of disclaimers before I share it. It mentions the existence of homosexuality. If I felt it was derogatory, though, I wouldn’t post it. For the record, the gay friends I’ve told it to have all found it hilarious.

I suppose you should also know that it contains a few slightly bad words for both the female and the male anatomy, but they’re not that bad, and they’re nothing you haven’t heard a million times before on network TV. If you don’t like any bad words at all–or if you’re at work or something–then you may want to stop reading now, or else read it when you get home.

Still with me? Okay. The joke starts now.

* * * * *
Kid A: Are you a ‘fag’ or a ‘mag’?

Kid B: I’m a mag!

Kid A: Do you know what that is?

Kid B: No, but I’m no fag.

Kid A: Okay, so you’re a mag?

Kid B: Yeah.

Kid A: MaleAssGrabber? Gross!

Kid B: OH. No no, I’m a fag! I’m a fag!

Kid A: (turns toward full playground) Hey, everybody, he just told me he’s a fag!

Kid B: (angrily) What? Yeah, I’m a FemaleAssGrabber!
* * * * *

Anyway.

There’s also the alternative version of the joke, which adds a couple of letters to the synonyms involved:

* * * *
Kid A: Are you a ‘fagit’ or a ‘magit’?
(Yeah, that’s how they’re spelled; you’ll see why.)

Kid B: I’m a magit!

Kid A: Yeah, well, I’m a fagit.

Kid B: You’re a fagit??

Kid A: Yeah. . .FemaleAssGrabberIncludingTits.

Kid B: What’s a magit then?

Kid A: MaleAssGrabberIncludingTesticles.

Kid B: Oh, then I’m a fagit too. (By now he knows he’s been had.)

Kid A: Hey, everybody. . .etc.
* * * *

Out of the mouths of babes, eh? Man, when I first heard someone tell that–remember, I was eight years old–I thought it was the funniest thing ever, which actually reminds me of another joke from third grade. Or maybe it was fourth; I can’t quite remember. Anyway, it’s not an actual joke, it’s more of a response to one, and it can be used after any joke in the history of jokes. You’ll see what I mean. Oh, and there are no bad words or anything, so you’re safe.

* * * * *
Kid A: [just finishes telling a joke]

Kid B: Ha ha ha ha. That’s really funny. I first heard it from my great-great-great-great FiveThousandGreats grandfather–and he invented the dinosaur. When he first heard that joke, he laughed so hard that he fell off his pet dinosaur and broke his wooden underwear, and that’s what led to the dumbest invention ever; the inflatable dart board.
* * * * *

Yeah. You’re not the only one not laughing. You’re not really supposed to be, though, because it’s not meant to be funny. It’s supposed to be a joke killer, to be used when another kid thinks that he’s FamouslyHilariousComedian. As soon as he finishes telling some lame joke, instead of laughter, this bizarre monologue comes flying back at him. It’s guaranteed to kill any other joke, but be careful. If you use this non-joke yourself, you may very well end up looking like a supreme weirdo at the same time.

I think this might be one of the strangest blog entries I’ve ever written.

Tonight I was supposed to drive to WestHillsSuburb to buy a guitar pedal that I found online. When the time came, however, my car balked.

It started, died after about three seconds, and then wouldn’t start up again.

I went back inside and looked in the repair manual, then went out and looked at the engine. Everything looked normal, but I didn’t hear the little humming noise that usually happens every time you turn the key. I kept trying to start the car, but it was all for naught.

Grrrr. I decided to let the engine sit for a while and see if maybe it was just flooded or something. I hung out and listened to the news and caught up on all the blogs that I haven’t had time to read lately. I also e-mailed the guy who was selling the pedal to tell him my car wasn’t starting, and that it looked like I was gonna be stuck at home for the night.

After about half an hour, in the interest of empirical research, I decided to try to start the car again. It started right up like the little champ that it is. I love it and simultaneously hate it when stuff like that happens.

Okay, okay. . .I get it; I’m not supposed to buy that guitar pedal.