My Halloween was fun, but not exactly in the way I expected it would be.  My Plan was that I would dress up as a grown-up Harry Potter, with a lightning-shaped forehead scar and a wand, but just dress the way I normally do, with no wig or anything.  I thought that would’ve been very clever and hilarious, but I wasn’t able to find a makeup kit for the scar here locally, so that was the end of that.

At work, there were a whole bunch of people who dressed up, some of whom were very clever.  One of my friends dressed up as the dead girl from the movie The Ring.  I wanted to take a little video of her, and she asked if I wanted her to walk in a creepy way, and I said, “No way, it’s much creepier if you just walk normally.”

One guy covered himself in wrapping paper with a sign on his chest that said, “To: Women   From:  GOD”.  Get it?  God’s Gift to Women?  It was pretty hilarious, actually.  I didn’t get a picture of him wearing the suit, but I was lucky enough to get an even better picture, because before he left work, he took the suit off and left it propped up on his friend’s chair.  It looked like a golem sitting there, ready at any moment to come to life and start wandering around the office.

My supervisor was dressed in a purple-with-leopard-skin suit and hat, and was a very convincing pimp, which sparked my friend and I into a whole conversation about the fact that it’s interesting how bad people have become idealized in our society, and are now seen as positive role models, and we further extrapolated that at some point in the future (perhaps hundreds of years, but it WILL happen), children will glue little mustaches under their noses, with swastika bands around their arms, and goose-step through their neighborhoods dressed as little Hitlers.

I dunno. . .in my experience, Halloween is the time of year when women dress up either as cats or prostitutes (or the ‘sexy’ version of anything) and men dress up as women.

My brother, when he was in college, used to volunteer at a local cathedral to provide an ‘alternative’ Halloween celebration, in which kids of all ages could come and celebrate in a place without partying or drugs, but still have a good time.  One kid apparently showed up wearing a skeleton mask and a nice suit, and when everyone asked what he was, he replied awkwardly, “Uhhh. . .Skeletal Pimp?”

Everyone laughed, and told him, “Dude. . .you’re in a church. . .you can’t wear that crap to a church.  Besides, do you even know what a pimp is?”


“Okay, what is it?”

“Uhh. . .it’s. . .uhh. . .I don’t know.”

They told him.  “So it’s not the most acceptable thing to wear to a church, and not the most positive thing you could be wearing.”

I always find it interesting and telling to see the ways in which people choose to dress themselves up.  It seems like a ‘no duh’ when a gay guy dresses up as a woman, but here’s an interesting twist on that theme that also comes from my workplace.  It’s a gay girl who dressed up as an androgynous superhero, which I thought was completely brilliant.  I love the sign on her cape and cummerbun.

Here’s another example of a costume that I think is absolutely brilliant.  It’s Allanah, dressed as a Duracell battery.  Pure genius.

And me?  I spent the evening making dinner and walking my neighborhood with J.  We made Smoked Salmon Alfredo and beet salad, and then walked the streets of Irvington, watching the kids in their costumes.  We also inadvertently proved to be volunteer firefighters, when we noticed a strange smell on the next block over.  We came around the corner and saw a pumpkin on fire, belching flames and acrid black smoke into the neighborhood.  Without hesitating, we went up the steps and each ran to various doors of the duplex.  J rang the doorbell to no avail, so she ran in the door and up the stairs, yelling, “Your pumpkin’s on fire!”  The slightly stoned-looking frat guy came down the stairs, saying, “Oh, really?”  He walked outside and tried to blow out the flaming pumpkin, which only fanned the flames and made it worse.  He then went beside the house and grabbed a yellow plastic recycling tub and pushed the pumpkin into that, flames and all.  I’m going to walk over there tomorrow during the day to see if any permanent damage was done to the building.

I went to bed at 10:15 and slept until 12:45 this afternoon, when I went downstairs and spent the next couple of hours reorganizing my stuff in the basement.  It’s quite an improvement over the picture I took the other day, when the furnace removers piled all of our stuff into a big pile.

Tonight, Tossed In and I are going to see a play, ActionAdventure’s Fall of the House.

Good times are definitely in store.