beautiful, funny, sad & true

In case you didn’t know, I grew up in Yakima, Washington. It’s a very isolated town in the middle of Washington. People who live there may tell you that “well, it’s a good place to raise kids” or whatever, but I was a kid growing up there, and I feel like it was a difficult place, particularly compared to the city in which I was born.

It’s long been one of the drug hubs of the entire nation, and that’s especially astounding when you consider that fact per capita. I used to have a little Honda CRX when I lived there, and I’d always leave the doors unlocked, because otherwise the windows would get smashed out by drug addicts looking for things to steal. It used to get rummaged through almost every single night. In fact, I was thrilled on the rare occasions when I’d go outside in the morning and NOT find the glove compartment open, the seats pushed forward, the carpet pulled up, the little storage hatch open, and the hatchback popped open. Very often, I’d find that all of those things had been done. Seriously; Yakima’s a shit-hole (and I don’t normally throw terms like that around, either), and I hated living there.

A friend of mine saw this a couple of days ago, in McSweeney’s, and e-mailed it to me. I had to laugh. I wasn’t at all surprised to learn that Yakima is now the meth capital of Central Washington. It’s been called “Crackima” for ages, since the 80’s, when crack was the Thing to Do. Even the mayor’s son got busted for using and selling it, back in the day.

Can I just say how much life has improved since I moved to Portland? It really feels like I’ve lived two entirely separate lives, even though Portland is (I’ve HEARD) the meth capital of the whole Pacific Northwest. I will always appreciate where I am now, and how much I enjoy life now, because I spent so many years wondering why life was even worth living.

Books saved my life; “The Little Prince” came along just when I needed it. Movies saved my life; “My Dinner With Andre” and “Mindwalk” came along just when I needed them. My piano saved my life. My guitar saved my life.

Glad to be outta there, Yakima. Good riddance.

I wouldn’t call it beautiful, but it’s certainly funny, a little sad, and true.

I came across this story yesterday about a guy who heard a woman screaming for help in the apartment upstairs. So he grabs his sword, runs upstairs and bursts into the apartment, only to find a guy sitting alone watching a porno. The police arrive, take him to jail, take his sword, and charge him with a bunch of pretty heavy-duty charges.

I think they should all be dismissed.

As far as I’m concerned, it’s all about intent. He went up there to save a damsel in distress. If it had been a rape, Our Hero would probably be getting knighted right now, instead of becoming a character in an obscure (but still very witty and insightful!) blog halfway across the country.

A toast. . .to James Van Iveren.

He did the right thing–albeit in an unusual way–in a moment when most people would have stuck their heads in the sand. Let’s hope all the charges get dropped.

I heard an amazing Global Warming statistic on NPR the other night:

“If everyone in America switched from regular incandescent light bulbs to compact fluorescent light bulbs in their homes, it would be the equivalent of taking 100 million cars off the road.”

My horoscope today. . .

“For the next few days, it may seem as if you can do no wrong in the eyes of the people around you–quite a change from earlier this week!”

For the record, I put zero stock in astrology, but I have to admit that sometimes it seems uncannily accurate. I mean. . .LET’S HOPE. Cause nothing’s happened yet. But I mean, ‘fingers crossed’ and all that. Work this week has been terrible and stressful. I’ve come home tied in knots every single night. Even music-related stuff has been kinda stressful, or at least frustrating.

I’m reallyreally hoping that the horoscope is as accurate as some have been. My favorite one of all time was in 1998–after three years of not owning a car–the day I got my Toyota truck:
“You are no longer a prisoner of inertia.”

Either way, I don’t really care so much about ‘the eyes of the people around me’, but here’s hoping the end of this week is better than the beginning was.

Today was a day to hold myself to my New Year’s resolution. Not the ‘find a studio space’ part, but the ‘take care of things more’ part. I went to the store this morning and bought a few things that will make it easier for me to keep my car clean. Incidentally, I also washed my car–IN THE RAIN–this morning. As soon as I was done, the rain stopped, so I cleaned the inside. I did everything except vacuum it, because I need a really super long extension cord, and I couldn’t find one.

I also bought a bunch of ‘staple’ food, like different types of beans, beets, olives, peppers, cheeses, and tortillas so I can cook and eat at home more. I have a nice kitchen now, and I have to get into the habit of using it. If I can have most of the makings of a really good salad, stir fry or burrito here, I’ll be way ahead of the curve.

After I was done with the car, I came in and cleaned the bathroom, and I even scrubbed the floor in there. Oh yeah. . .since you saw the picture of my loaded-up car the other day, you probably noticed the rug in the back. Well, it’s actually on the floor now. AND my little surround-sound speakers are plugged in again; they’re behind the sofa. Speaking of the sofa, I want to go to Pier 1 or somewhere and find some big pillows for it, now that I have the rug down.

These are all things I’ve been wanting to do for months, and my new ‘m.o.’ for this year is to do more things I’ve been wanting to do–just because it give me a sense of accomplishment to be able to do them–and take care of things that need to be taken care of. Like old debts from about three years ago, when I was living hand-to-mouth and couldn’t afford to do ANYTHING. You may remember that time. Here’s an example:
YOU: Hey, Todd, want to go see a movie? It’s at Laurelhurst. [Movies are $3 there.]
ME: Oh, I WANT to. . .but I’ve already been to a movie this month, so I’d better not.

Or this:
YOU: Hey, Todd, my friends and I are going out to dinner, want to come?
ME: Maybe. Where are you guys going?
YOU: I dunno, how ’bout [insert the name of any restaurant here]?
ME: Jeez, I wish I could. I can’t really afford it though, and besides, I just went and bought a bunch of those ten-for-a-dollar things of ramen, so I’d better eat that. I have green onions and pea pods on it this time, so it’s practically frickin’ gourmet!

Anyway. . .some of that old stuff has started to catch up with me, so I need to take care of it.

Here’s to the year of taking care of Mister T!