Boy, you can sure tell when I get super busy, because I’m not able to write for a few days.

The last couple of days have been crazy, with work right to a gig each night. I’ll have some more time to write tomorrow, hopefully, but I’m going to brunch with one person, and dinner with another, so it might have to be in the evening.

I got invited last night to play a gig tonight with Tony Furtado. Tony’s a slide guitar and banjo player; one of the best in the country, in fact. He and Stephanie play together–they do live together, after all–so he and I have shared the stage plenty of times before. This show will be a little different, though, since it’s Tony’s show instead of Steph’s. I’m honored to be playing, and I think it’ll be really fun.

I’ve been feeling better this week than I have for the last few. I’m starting to feel better about the situation with Kelly; I miss the good things about our relationship, and there were plenty, but it was really difficult a lot of the time too–eating disorders are vicious–and I certainly don’t miss that. There are still times I miss her, of course, but by now I pretty much feel like myself again, and feel like I have things to offer to someone who will appreciate them. That’s the hardest part about a rough break-up; the way the littlest things can get under your skin and fester.

ANYWAY.

I’m going to go crash for a while before the show. I was supposed to meet Andrea for dinner tonight, but I was feeling too exhausted and sleepy to be any kind of good company, so we rescheduled for tomorrow night.

Talk to you soon; I hope all’s well with you.

I came across this quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson today:

“Those who cannot tell what they desire or expect still sigh and struggle with indefinite thoughts and vast wishes.”

It really rang true for me.

Something tells me that RWE wrote it from the position of omniscience–as if he knew exactly what he desired and expected, and he therefore assumed that the readers would know as well–but I’ve struggled my whole life with indefinite thoughts and vast wishes. I’m working on defining them all the time, though, y’know?

Whether it’s ways I want to be treated (and ways I treat my partner, too) in a romantic relationship, things about myself that could use improvement, paths I want my career to take (and what I need to do to create them); a million things.

I’m working on believing in myself enough to do all these things; that’s what I think it boils down to. Do I trust myself enough to do what needs to be done?
Sometimes yes, sometimes no. In some ways I am infinitely strong and resilient. In other ways, if you so much as threaten to bend me, even a little bit, I break.

I’m not bummed out or anything, I’m just ruminating here.

I had a really nice weekend. The Young Immortals, Lauren, Valerie, Michael, Joan, Susan, John, and Renee all made their way into this weekend. And I still had time to sleep for twelve hours each night. Nicccccce.

There are two Breanna shows this week, both of which are Breanna/cello/violin. Should be a blast, as per usual.

I feel like I’m rambling now, but I just felt compelled to write and let you know that the weekend was relaxing but really nice, and I got to see a lot of friends I haven’t seen in quite some time. And on that note, can I just take a minute to say how proud I am of Jake, Mike, and Scotty of the Young Immortals? They were amazing to watch the other night, and their hard work is really starting to pay off.

Here are a few pictures from the play reading the other night.

The guy with the beard is the playwright.
The guy with the accordion and no beard is me.

This is Todd Sabel, the director. In the world of The Theatah, however, he’s known as T. Austin Sabel.

These readings are great fun, and I’m tremendously honored to have the privilege of attending them. Thank you, Todd, for giving me the opportunity!

I found these on YouTube tonight. They’re videos of songs by the Young Immortals; “The Fever” and “Motive”, respectively. Totally surreal for me, because Jake and I recorded these songs in my old apartment last year. He wrote the songs, and the two of us played all the instruments. Now “The Fever” is on a Starbucks compilation CD, and there are teenage girls making videos. CRAZY.

Cool!

Still it’s surreal, especially for an introvert such as myself. But ultimately, the music speaks for itself, much better than I ever could. “The Fever” is a smash hit.

Normally I don’t post second-hand things here, but as soon as I saw this picture, I knew it was an instant classic.

This and about a zillion others like it can be found here.

Enjoy!