Hooray. Or something.

sad 4 Comments »

FINALLY, some good news on the work front; I’m being reassigned.

Every day for the last four months, I’ve felt as if I were back in grade school.

It’s been proven that if a child isn’t challenged enough, and is consistently given tasks that are too easy for him to do, and he has difficulty completing them, it can look (from an outside observer’s standpoint) as if the child is “delayed”, not being able to handle even those simple tasks. He may be passed over for advanced programs, and indeed have to suffer countless remedial training programs instead, often feeling as if there’s something wrong with him for not being able to handle these tasks. This may go on for months or years, until such time as either the child or the teachers realize the mistake, if it is ever realized.

Assuming that it IS realized, the child will thrive and continue to grow and learn exponentially. Assuming that it is not, the child is in for a life of drudgery. This is what I’ve felt like at work for the last four months: a delayed child.

Wow, that was a little too cathartic. And this was supposed to be a celebratory entry.

Well, truth be told, even if it’s just for a few more days, the situation I’m in is the same, so I still feel just as squeezed. Constantly going through long lists of bizarre and arcane minutiae, constantly flipping between five or sometimes even six computer programs at the same time, constantly being pressed to work faster and “focus” by my supervisor (who has me keep track of all my time and activities throughout the day). . .it’s just fucking endless. Or at least it WAS, until last Monday at 4:00.

Starting this coming Monday, I’ll be starting in a new position. I’m thrilled; I’m at the point where I almost don’t care what it is, just as long as it’s not THIS one.

sometimes these are dead-on

sad, true 1 Comment »

My horoscope today. . .

“For the next few days, it may seem as if you can do no wrong in the eyes of the people around you–quite a change from earlier this week!”

For the record, I put zero stock in astrology, but I have to admit that sometimes it seems uncannily accurate. I mean. . .LET’S HOPE. Cause nothing’s happened yet. But I mean, ‘fingers crossed’ and all that. Work this week has been terrible and stressful. I’ve come home tied in knots every single night. Even music-related stuff has been kinda stressful, or at least frustrating.

I’m reallyreally hoping that the horoscope is as accurate as some have been. My favorite one of all time was in 1998–after three years of not owning a car–the day I got my Toyota truck:
“You are no longer a prisoner of inertia.”

Either way, I don’t really care so much about ‘the eyes of the people around me’, but here’s hoping the end of this week is better than the beginning was.

Takin’ care of Mr. T

beautiful, funny, sad, true No Comments »

Today was a day to hold myself to my New Year’s resolution. Not the ‘find a studio space’ part, but the ‘take care of things more’ part. I went to the store this morning and bought a few things that will make it easier for me to keep my car clean. Incidentally, I also washed my car–IN THE RAIN–this morning. As soon as I was done, the rain stopped, so I cleaned the inside. I did everything except vacuum it, because I need a really super long extension cord, and I couldn’t find one.

I also bought a bunch of ’staple’ food, like different types of beans, beets, olives, peppers, cheeses, and tortillas so I can cook and eat at home more. I have a nice kitchen now, and I have to get into the habit of using it. If I can have most of the makings of a really good salad, stir fry or burrito here, I’ll be way ahead of the curve.

After I was done with the car, I came in and cleaned the bathroom, and I even scrubbed the floor in there. Oh yeah. . .since you saw the picture of my loaded-up car the other day, you probably noticed the rug in the back. Well, it’s actually on the floor now. AND my little surround-sound speakers are plugged in again; they’re behind the sofa. Speaking of the sofa, I want to go to Pier 1 or somewhere and find some big pillows for it, now that I have the rug down.

These are all things I’ve been wanting to do for months, and my new ‘m.o.’ for this year is to do more things I’ve been wanting to do–just because it give me a sense of accomplishment to be able to do them–and take care of things that need to be taken care of. Like old debts from about three years ago, when I was living hand-to-mouth and couldn’t afford to do ANYTHING. You may remember that time. Here’s an example:
YOU: Hey, Todd, want to go see a movie? It’s at Laurelhurst. [Movies are $3 there.]
ME: Oh, I WANT to. . .but I’ve already been to a movie this month, so I’d better not.

Or this:
YOU: Hey, Todd, my friends and I are going out to dinner, want to come?
ME: Maybe. Where are you guys going?
YOU: I dunno, how ’bout [insert the name of any restaurant here]?
ME: Jeez, I wish I could. I can’t really afford it though, and besides, I just went and bought a bunch of those ten-for-a-dollar things of ramen, so I’d better eat that. I have green onions and pea pods on it this time, so it’s practically frickin’ gourmet!

Anyway. . .some of that old stuff has started to catch up with me, so I need to take care of it.

Here’s to the year of taking care of Mister T!

snow, chains, Le Sigh

Oregon, Portland, sad 2 Comments »

For those of you who live elsewhere, Portland got hit with about 4 or 5 inches of snow overnight. This was a big surprise to those of us who’d been driving around last night, and it was clear.

So this morning, I get to work (don’t even ask how work was today), pull my phone out of my bag, to find a voice mail from Kelly, who’s stranded at work. When she left this morning, they were planning to be open, but at about 7:45 (when she was already on her way) they decided to close because the roads were getting bad. She actually had to park her car and hike up the steep couple of streets to her work to get there. The roads are starting to ice up, and she asked if I could come get her and take her home. I told my supervisor and headed home to put chains on my car and head out.

The short version of the story is that I’m 36 years old, and I’ve never had to put chains on a car before. It wasn’t pretty. I felt like the biggest retard since Retarded Jack McRetardson, back in 1687. I spent more than half an hour looking at little diagrams that didn’t make sense, reading things that didn’t make sense, trying and failing repeatedly, and feeling completely humiliated. So I go to call poor Kelly. By this time, she’s left another voicemail saying that her dad has an appointment at 10 something, she has a lunch packed, and she’s not going to freeze or die. So if I can’t do it, she can call her dad. Problem is, he has to come from Brush Prarie, but at least he’s got a 4-wheel drive truck, and he knows what to do with chains.

So I call her back and tell her I don’t think I’m going to be able to do it, and can she call her dad after all, because I can’t figure out how get the chains on. She agrees, but she sounds bummed, and obviously I’m super-bummed cause I feel like an idiot.

So I stay home for a bit longer, try to warm up and be less disappointed in myself, and then I head back to work. After a little while, I call Kelly to make sure she’s home and safe, and she is, so that’s a huge relief. Two hours later, my work sends us all home because the weather is now well below freezing, and the roads are getting really nasty. After walking home from work for the second time, I’m pretty tired, but I think of poor Kelly sitting there at work, and that’s all the motivation I need. It’s unacceptable for me not to know how to put chains on a car.
So I’ve just spent the last hour doing that. I’m freezing, wet, dirty, bleeding, and I still feel like a super-idiot, but at least I have effing chains on my car now.

Oh, by the way. There’s a Stephanie Schneiderman show tonight at Mississippi Studios. It’ll be really cool, if the show’s not cancelled. . .we’re opening for a French guy. I’m sure it’s gonna be cancelled, though.

Le Sigh.

a fairly normal dream

dreams 1 Comment »

Last night I had a dream in which I was at some sort of fundraiser function in the basement of a church or school. My friends and I were putting this thing on, and the people who were at this event kept expecting us to make these special cookies. We were frantically trying to wash all the dishes that were piled up all over the room, so we’d have room to cook, and people were starting to get restless and angry. I went looking around for a recipe, and I finally found one on the bottom of a cereal box (which seems perfectly logical, right?)

Somebody came up and asked me how soon the cookies would be ready, so I gestured toward the long tables full of dishes and said, “Well, you can see what we’re dealing with here. . .”

Then I woke up.

I didn’t want to, however, because the bed was so o o o comfortable. It was especially cold in Oregon last night, so we threw the nice, soft blue blanket on top of the bed, and slept like. . .uhh. . .two people. . .who. . .slept well.

Iron Horse

Yakima, beautiful, funny, music 1 Comment »

When I was in high school and early college, my friends and I had a band called Iron Horse.

Blaine used to make these hilarious tapes, where he’d sing and play guitar and make up songs on the spot, and bring them to school for me and a handful of other people to listen to. I can’t begin to describe them, but there were studio ones, mock radio shows, “live” shows (where he’d use his Casio keyboard to sample crowd noise, then he’d set up his amp and PA and everything on the back patio and sing to the hillsides behind his house). . .yes, some of those tapes still exist.

Long story short, I thought the tapes were great, and wanted to play guitar with him on some of them. Of course, this changed the sound dramatically, so we started writing “real” songs, instead of improvising. We would use a four-track tape recorder, a drum machine, and a keyboard to make some surprisingly decent recordings, and work out our ideas.

After collaborating for a while, we thought that the natural next step would be to start a band. Russ was a neighborhood friend of Blaine’s who had a really high singing voice, and he also was learning to play bass. So he was in. Eric played drums amazingly well, and after just one ‘audition’, on everything we could think of (including a tongue-in-cheek rendition of “Bark At The Moon” by Ozzy Osbourne), he was in. Tony was a friend of Blaine and Russ’s from the church they went to. He’d done lots of singing and acting, he had a really strong voice, and he could also play rhythm guitar, so he was in.

We had to come up with a name, at which point we had a problem because the tapes that Blaine and I had been making, under the name “Iron Horse”, were starting to get a little bit of attention from The Kids. So since we couldn’t come up with anything better, we decided to go with that name, even though we knew it was kinda cheesy.

Once the band was formed, we set out rehearsing and playing shows, like bands do. Incidentally, the first time I saw the movie “Donnie Darko”, I cracked up to myself. You know how its chapters are different days in October 1988? Every time one of those came on the screen, I’d think, “Hey, that’s when Iron Horse played this one show. . .!” or whatever. Hilarious.
Anyway. . .we made a good go of it for about a year and a half as a full band. If you count all those early tapes, then it was probably more like two and a half, or maybe even three years. Our lives pulled us in different directions and locations, as often happens, but we all look back fondly on that time.

We’ve gotten together a couple of times over the years, and we even filmed one of those reunion “performances”–it was really a one-off rehearsal, but we sounded better than ever, after not even playing together for six years!–and put it on television, where it ran regularly for a few months after that.

So why am I telling you all this now?

Because at some point recently, I realized that 2007 is the twentieth anniversary of the formation of Iron Horse. Blaine and I were e-mailing each other, and I mentioned that to him, and we thought it would be fun to do all new recordings of those songs. You know. . .in all that free time that we have. Since Blaine and I are both semi-professional producers and recording engineers these days, we’ll be able to make it sound really great, and have a blast doing it. The working title of the project so far is Iron Horse – XX.

Yes, I KNOW you want to hear something, or see something, or both. I don’t have a way to transfer video tapes to my computer—at least not without a lot of hassle and expense–but I do have a box full of old cassettes and CD’s floating around, and a book or two full of pictures, so I’ll find some good stuff and post it soon so you too can capture the magic of the “rock and roll juggernaut.” No. . .the magic of “Central Washington’s rockin’ machine.”

Yes, that’s it; THAT’S what we were. Or so we keep telling ourselves, even after twenty years.

New Year’s resolution

beautiful, music, recording No Comments »

For the last few years, New Year’s resolutions haven’t been a big deal. I’ve just made a conscious effort to ‘be a better person’, ‘appreciate the good people and things I have going for me’, etc. That’s all great, but this year I have a very specific resolution; I need to either find or create my own recording studio space.

I need a place where I can do My Thing, and invite people over to be involved. My Thing involves playing and recording drums, piano, loud guitars, et cetera. It needs to be a place where I can be an actual professional; it’s time to take the next step up. I need it to be either soundproofed or to be quiet enough where noise from outside isn’t a problem for me, and where the noise I make inside isn’t a problem for others. Perhaps I could have my own room or section of an existing studio? I’m totally open to that idea too.

I’d love to share the space with another person or two, preferably who are already professional musicians and recording people too. I need them to be as responsible and conscientious as I am myself. I’m not ‘married’ to a specific location, but I would prefer it to be in inner NE or SE Portland, or maybe downtown.

If you either know of any leads for affordable space, or a person who you think might be interested in this, please let me know.

Thanks for reading, and have a happy New Year!

favorite pictures of 2006

Oregon, Portland, Washington, beautiful, pictures, true 2 Comments »

As you may or may not have already known, I’ve wanted a camera for a long time now. This was the year that I finally splurged and got a decent one. Here, then, are my favorite pictures from this year.

a beautiful October day in Portlandunder the Fremont bridge in PortlandConstruction site in downtown Boise, Idaho McKinley performing “Jamie’s Got a Gun”, taken from backstage at the Night of the Murder Ballad
another of McKinley at Murder BalladKelly on the waterfront in AstoriaKelly warming up with coffee in Astoriainside a cave in Cannon Beach, Oregon
Also Cannon Beach. A kid knocked them down right after this picture was taken.karaoke night
stormy day in Carson, WashingtonJacob Ray of the Young ImmortalsBreanna Paletta of Rye Hollow

but my favorite of the year is this one:

bridge and double rainbow in Astoria, Oregon


All pictures copyright 2006 by me.  If you’d like copies or anything, please leave a comment and we can work that out.